Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs

May 26, 2011 11:25 pm

Hi, I’m Casey. It has been two months and four days since my last blog post. I could list a bunch of shitty excuses (Disney Trip, Elliot got her tonsils out, Elliot’s birthday, I got my period a couple of times, it’s summer in FL and we like the pool, a blade of grass moved on my street), but you don’t really care about those. Let’s just focus on me being back, shall we?

Jamie got all excited on a recent date night over the below menu item. Apparently being “boned tableside” is not the same thing he was expecting:

Why, fortune cookie saying maker uppers, why?

I picked up a “lifesaver” board game for the kids the other day at a thrift store. You know, shit like stranger danger and fire safety which I though would be good for them. It was only after I got the game home did I realize that there are some soul searching questions included in the game:

Correct me if I’m wrong, but is the answer “yes, please”?

Is Disney making their princesses with penises these days? Belle has an impressive, uh, unit, wouldn’t you say?

The nastiness that was Elliot’s tonsils. She handled the surgery like a champ and is back to being a fearless superhero-loving hilarious kid.

We shelled out the cash for season passes to Disney so it’s gonna be a sweaty assed, magical summer.

That’s all I’ve got for now. May your days be full of cannonballs and endless swimming. Or at the very least, tableside boning.

17 Comments

Michele
on May 27th, 2011 at 12:02 am
1
JR would have been disappointed also.

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Mrsbear
on May 27th, 2011 at 1:03 am
2
What the hey-hey?

Look at you stringing words together and such! I’m so proud.

You’ve inspired me!

No wait, the TVs on. Maybe later.

Reply to this Comment
SuziCate
on May 27th, 2011 at 1:13 am
3
I have missed the laughter…thanks for throwing a bit our way!!!!!! Hope you have a great fun filled summer, and if there’s any tableside boning, let us know!

Reply to this Comment
Sprite's Keeper
on May 27th, 2011 at 1:59 am
4
MISSED YOU! And Elliot can swim! Sprite would be so jealous of her. She’s dying to try out her new swim goggles, but I don’t feel like waiting 2 hours at the community pool to get in. (That’s right. 2 fucking hours…)

Reply to this Comment
Cat
on May 27th, 2011 at 1:14 pm
5
You know for a fact how to remedy his disappointment, and yet you refuse.

I knew there was a reason I love you.

Reply to this Comment
MamaBadger
on May 27th, 2011 at 5:01 pm
6
Tableside, poolside. I could just use a boning these days. Oh, wait that would mean I have to stay awake after I put the kids to bed. Hasn’t happened recently.

Enjoy all your warm weather! We usually open our pool on Memorial Day, but the weather’s been so goofy we haven’t even thought about it!

Reply to this Comment
Captain Dumbass
on May 27th, 2011 at 5:20 pm
7
You may have been gone for two months, but when you come back with a ‘boned tabled side’ and a Princess Belle hermaphrodite? Worth the wait.

Reply to this Comment
Anne
on May 27th, 2011 at 11:47 pm
8
Happy summer! Lovely to see you back. Having Disney season passes would be a dream come true for my girls. Sadly it is way too far for a day trip.

Reply to this Comment
Stacy Uncorked
on May 28th, 2011 at 2:32 am
9
And now I’ve completely forgotten the witty comment I had come up with in my head, because I’m snickering like a 12-year old boy from the comments.

WELCOME BACK! You are back, right? RIGHT??? Although, if taking a break enables you to spin gold like this, I might have to follow your lead. But I won’t do a table side boner. Sorry.

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Krystal
on May 28th, 2011 at 1:47 pm
10
Now my blogging circle is complete!! Casey!! How I have missed you – let me count the ways….1) snark….2) humor…..3) parenting….4) insanity….5) YOU!!!

Glad you’re back and thanks for the warning on the disney sippy cups – I will make sure to keep Gabby away from them, little Princess is obsessed with the Princesses, don’t want to scare her…. welcome back!!

Reply to this Comment
bex
on May 28th, 2011 at 6:58 pm
11
My husband is researching possibly opening a rib restaurant. That menu item might bring in a lot of business! I’ll let him know – thanks for the tip!

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ck
on May 30th, 2011 at 11:13 pm
12
Welcome back, Casey!

And season passes to Disney? I can’t even imagine that being an option. My kids will be lucky if they get to go there once in their life.

Reply to this Comment
VandyJ
on May 31st, 2011 at 1:26 am
13
Who wouldn’t want to be boned table side?
As for Belle? Well I always thought that Disney was hiding something about all those princesses.
Good to see you back. And with the snark too.

Reply to this Comment
Keely
on June 1st, 2011 at 3:17 am
14
Good lord. Is that Belle thing a…SIPPY CUP?

Reply to this Comment
lin
on June 1st, 2011 at 1:12 pm
15
Yea! I’m glad you are back!! But I will have to tell ya–with that rockin’ swimming pool in the back yard, I would NEVER be online….EVER! And I would have the BEST tan in town! When can I come over????

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kyooty
on June 6th, 2011 at 2:26 pm
16
Oh now that’s Spring!!!:)

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Andrea
on June 14th, 2011 at 11:02 am
17
Well…you’re having a much better summer than I am. No boning or belle penises around here.

Nice to see you though. (you’ve got to make your blog in a mobile version. It’s the only way I get a chane to be on the Internet these days).

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