In lieu of an actual post, I thought I’d reenter the blogging world with some randomness. Things are still tough around here so don’t expect an coherent thoughts out of me just yet. Bitter thoughts, of course.

We’re on week three with no TV for the kids. YOU READ THAT RIGHT, WEEK THREE OF NO TV. Which basically means I’ve turned into a preschool teacher and we spend all day/every day manipulating Play-Doh, building blocks, coloring, painting and playing with toys. Playing with my kids all day is exhausting. But fun. The kids seem much happier because of it and I guess that’s a good thing. Jerks.

Almost a month has passed since we went completely dye free with the kid’s diets. This basically means scouring every single label and not letting them ingest anything that was prepared with artificial food dyes. Do you have any idea how fucking hard this is? It sucks. It was completely necessary though, my kids had turned into little Linda Blairs and we traced the behavioral problems back to the dyes in the foods they were eating. More to come but if you want to read up on it, you can do so here and here.

Proof that the above dietary change worked was provided when we let Graham eat something made with Egg Beaters in the ingredients and he turned into a hyperactive monster for two days following because of the yellow dye in the egg beaters.

Today at Gymbo, there was a group of Stepford-ish moms who were meeting up for a playgroup. They were more interested in gabbing then watching their approximately 9 month old kids and I wanted to punch them in the face. The moms, not the kids. Then Graham walked up to one to say hi and she immediately put her hands in the air and backed away from him like he has the plague. What the fuck, bitch. I’m going to train Graham to cough on people when they do that.

The highlight of the last month is the new double sink we had installed in the kid’s bathroom. That’s really all the good news I have to share. Pathetic.

Did you know that Whole Foods takes back #5 plastics for recycling? They send them off to some company who uses them to make razors and toothbrushes. We’ve been saving ours for a few months and decided to make the trek across town to turn them in and ended up spending $100 since we’d never been there before and the place was awesome. Nicely played, Whole Foods. Spending green while going green.

In the interest of being green, we switched to LED lights on the house this year. Can I just say holy bright lights, Batman? I’m pretty sure our house is visible from space and I have to turn them off when they kids go to bed since I don’t want to chance them waking up.

I picked four kids off of one of the Angel Trees this year. Is it bad that I regifted some of Graham’s birthday presents to one of the kids? I got him the shit he wanted and threw some of our unwanted gifts in there too.

Elliot recently started screaming my name the way Whitney Houston screams BOBBBBBBBBY!!! MOMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! So every morning when she wakes up, I hear Whitney screaming from her crib. It’s not a pleasant sound.

Graham has turned into quite the backseat driver lately. He screams for me to stop at red lights and stop signs and reminds me constantly to keep two hands on the wheel. For someone who can barely even maneuver his tricycle, he sure has a lot to say.

In the midst of potty training, Graham has been accompanying both Jamie and I on pretty much every bathroom trip and asks a million questions as he gets all up in our business. Last week, Graham watched Jamie pee and said “you have a big penis, Daddy!”. Jamie later sheepishly told me the story since he was embarrassed by the ordeal. The next day, Graham told me “you have a BIG penis, Mommy!” (I don’t, btw). I told Jamie not to let it go to his head since Graham tells that to everyone.


Stop by and give Keely a shout.

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32 Comments

  1. Amber
    on
    1

    FIRST!!! Boo-Yah! What the hell is up that that skank at Gymboree?? Ew.

    I’ve got to get caught up on your blog because this dye-free thing is news to me. Really? It was wiggin’ your kids out? How did you come to this conclusion???

    And just be grateful Elliot is screaming for you from her crib. She could be right next to you in your bed like Harley is.

    Wanna know how long it’s been since I had sex? You know you do…

  2. Peggy
    on
    2

    No food dye? No tv? Whoa…that’s tough stuff. I’ve got to be honest, I’ve never heard of the food dye theory. Interesting. Glad to hear that your hurculean efforts are paying off though!

    Question…do you and Jamie get to sneak in a little tv? I don’t think I could live without some “Real Housewives” or “Survivor”! Good Luck Casey and Happy Holidays!

  3. Cat
    on
    3

    See, just when I was about to call you a “crunchy granola lady”, you up and tell a penis story and I heart you again. You’ve been downgraded to “hippy dippy”. Good luck with all the changes!!!

  4. Heather
    on
    4

    I’ve been cutting way back on the amount of tv that my daughter watches and I know how hard it can be to break them of the habit so I pretty much think you’re super mom right now. I can only imagine how much work it is to cut out all food with dye in it, food shopping must take on a whole new meaning of hell!

  5. jen
    on
    5

    you. are. amazing.

    no food dye. no tv. taking your kids out in public. putting up with a 2 foot backseat driver.

    amazing.

  6. Stacy (the Random Cool Chick)
    on
    6

    Some friends of ours have the same issue with the food dye. It is hard to make sure there is NO dye in any of the food ingested – but what a difference it does make!

    I bet you’re getting pretty damn good with your inner artist self on the play-doh, aren’t you? πŸ˜‰

    I would totally train Graham to cough on people that react to him simply coming up to them by backing away with their hands raised. They’d deserve it.

    Princess Nagger does the backseat driving stuff, too – and since she can see the speedometer in hubby’s car, she’ll nag him when he’s going over the speed limit. I love having her be the ‘bad guy’ during those times when he’s driving like a maniac. πŸ˜‰

  7. Michele
    on
    7

    that no dye thing sounds like it’s working. Is Graham sleeping any better?

  8. Julie@Momspective
    on
    8

    You just continue to amaze me, woman. My 20 month old will at least point to the potty and pick it up. My first kid, he was a breeze. I had him trained at 14 months. This one? N-O-P-E.

  9. Jenni
    on
    9

    glad to hear from ya lady. no tv, huh? thats awesome. maybe that;ll be my new years resolution…

  10. Christopher (AKA: CaJoh)
    on
    10

    Wow, never thought that food dye had such an effect on children– good luck with that.

    My wife is a purist in that she hates LED lights or even the florescent ones. I keep threatening to hand her the electric bill, but wind up installing energy saving bulbs in places that she constantly leaves on.

    Thank you for your randomness,

  11. Harriet
    on
    11

    I have those Stepford-ish moms…
    Have a great day!
    http://iamharriet.blogspot.com/2009/12/do-we-need-santa-speedo-run-in-boston.html

  12. kyooty
    on
    12

    hahahaha, I feel bad for Jamie. It was embarrassing for my Hubbie too when one of our boys made an observation.

  13. Cyndi
    on
    13

    Wow, you are really hard core, and I’m glad to see all your work paying off πŸ™‚ (I’m sending you an email about the penis comment)SO jealous of the double sink. How far wrong could Elliot go if she has some of the vocal skills of Whitney?! Miss you, but thanx for the recent comments πŸ™‚

  14. Mama Badger
    on
    14

    I’m glad the whole die-free thing is working out for you. We recently went “dairy” free for one of our kids, and I’m amazed at the krappe that contains dairy. I’m sure it’s the same with dye. It makes all the difference, though.

  15. Sprite's Keeper
    on
    15

    I think I’ve become the antithesis of you. Just this morning Sprite said “Mommy, I need my five horses and DVD and Blue Ray.” I know she doesn’t know what they mean, but I swear, if she repeats that in public, I’ll have Children’s Services checking my electric bill for just how many hours that tv is on.

  16. Kendra
    on
    16

    You are amazing. I wish I had the tenacity you did to turn the tv off but sometimes it gives me a little me time. Go you!

  17. Lin
    on
    17

    Wow, that’s some tough stuff going on at your place, Casey. Can I send my idiot teen to your house to get straightened out? I may kill him otherwise. He got his cell phone, wallet, and I-touch stolen out of his gym locker today. Uh, did I mention that he is not allowed to bring the I-touch to school and has an Ipod for that specific reason? I’d say “good for him” if I didn’t pay for those expensive toys. Arrrrgghhh.

    I’m coming over to pound the play-doh like it was my idiot kid’s head.

    Oh, love the weiner story. Hilarious. If I wasn’t busy crying right now, I’d be cracking up.

  18. Shangrila
    on
    18

    Oy-no processed foods and no tv! You’re Mommying hardcore! I am so glad that you’re finding what works for you (even if it’s crazy hard!) Hang in there, hon (and slap that bitch at Gymboree for me! Srsly.)

  19. robin
    on
    19

    Poor Jamie… here he thought he was getting the best compliment ever. πŸ™‚
    Glad to see you posting again!

  20. Shan Shan
    on
    20

    I’m all for regifting-as long as its not a fire truck! πŸ™‚

  21. mrsbear
    on
    21

    Look at you getting back your random blogging groove. I dig it.

    I admire you ability to give the boob tube the axe. I’d never try it because I’d have to be committed within the week, but I admire you for it.

    Max is forever telling me when to stop and when to go while I’m driving. If there’s a green light within sight, he’s demanding I plow through fellow drivers in order to move forward. If I rear end you in traffic, I’m sorry. It’s his fault.

    I get the Moooooommmy shriek every morning. It is always unpleasant.

    You said penis. hehe

  22. Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings
    on
    22

    That woman at the Gymboree sucks! Those women are total snobs. I hope things get better there soon and the elimination of the dye works.

  23. Captain Dumbass
    on
    23

    So many things to comment on… First though, thanks for the link on the food dyes, I wonder if that has something to do with the Hulk-like transformations my 4 year old has been going through this year? And LED’s are fantastic. I don’t have any old lights left any more. My whole roof is wired up and it runs off a single outlet. We even use the for night lights in our kids rooms since the don’t produce any heat like those insane fucking children’s night lights that run so hot I’m surprised they don’t spontaneously combust.

  24. Keely
    on
    24

    Holy shit you’ve gone deep green! Nice work – that is some commitment right there. I’m glad they’re happier. I’m still trying to minimize X’s intake but hubby is a bit of a wild card πŸ™

  25. Karen @ If I Could Escape
    on
    25

    Well done you!! I so need to start limiting the TV with my wee one! You’re inspiring me!

    Oh yeah and I probably know that mom’s playgroup and can picture them all now!! Hehe!

  26. Mad Woman
    on
    26

    Food dye doesn’t agree with Boy Spawn either. But if I ever tried to take TV away, there’d be a mutiny in this household and I’d end up locked in a cupboard under the stairs or something.

  27. jessica
    on
    27

    I’ve never been told i had a huge penis. But big balls? Yeah, sure.

  28. Erin@TheLocalsLoveIt
    on
    28

    I swear your Gymboree is haunted.

    I’m keeping the food dye links in my back pocket. Good to know.

    I just love reading about your family…very entertaining.

  29. kat
    on
    29

    waw. i love it when you go random. i wish you go random everyday….

  30. Ginny Marie
    on
    30

    I wrote a paper on the Feingold Diet when I was an undergrad, which was already 20 years ago. (I’m old, don’t rub it in!) It’s so interesting to see that it’s still around!

    I took a week of TV away last Saturday because my kids’ behavior was so awful. I think we’re going to try to keep it off for a while, and see what happens. So far they really haven’t been bugging me to watch TV, which is a friggin’ miracle!

  31. Sandie
    on
    31

    No food dye? I can’t imagine how hard that is! I’m not even sure it’s possible to do something like that here…at least not without costing me an arm, a leg, and my first born shopping on the ecomony (exchange rates sucks right now, so things cost roughly double what they do in the States).

  32. Shangrila
    on
    32

    Hope that you’re still doing well! Happy holidays to you and yours! πŸ™‚

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