June 23, 2009 12:51 am
Jamie has a broken mouth corner that he keeps reinjuring every time he eats. It’s gotten to the point where I can’t not stare at it when he’s talking to me because it just looks so damn painful. Maybe if I tape his mouth shut for a few days it would give him time to heal.
It’s the end of the world as we know it. That’s the only thing that would make sense because Nestles recalled their cookie dough.
Last night, I heard yelling coming from the garage. Jamie was spewing a bunch of compound swear words and some of them were really impressive. He spilled a bag of raw chicken juice everywhere. I had a hard time not laughing but I relieved him of cleanup duty and sent him inside to stew on his (chicken) juices.
Remember a few weeks ago when I was all “I love Florida, the weather is great and we’re playing in the pool all the time!”. Scratch that, it’s fucking hot here and we’re trapped indoors since going outside would cause the kids to pass out from the heat. Somebody please save us, it’s only June and it’s already in the high 90’s with 21333413241255% humidity every.single.day.
My overplucked eyebrow is slowly growing back in. The only person who noticed was my friend Shannon who made a HUGE deal over it when I saw her last week. She later revealed that she’d read about it on my blog and that it wasn’t that bad. If you’re Helen Keller.
Are Helen Keller jokes still funny? I’m sorry if they’re not. How about Stevie Wonder jokes? Ray Charles? I’ll stop now.
We’re pretty much a self-contained entity since our closest family is forty-five minutes away. I think we need a lifeline. You know, somebody who checks in on us every day to make sure we haven’t been murdered. Any takers?
I’m feeling off my random game today. I promise to do better next time. Sheesh.
Tags: Random Tuesday Thoughts