For months after Graham was born (in December of 06′), I couldn’t sleep. Not to be confused with the freakishly zombie-like state that comes along with having a newborn, this was in addition to that.

While I was in the hospital having Graham, somebody broke into my husband’s truck in the parking garage. They didn’t take anything substantial since we hardly use the truck and don’t keep any personal items in it. They did drill out the cylinder for the lock and take that with them. The hospital security guard later told us that newest way of stealing cars is to hit someplace like this, take the cylinders and have keys made so they can come back and drive off with the cars. How efficient. We must have gotten discharged just in time since the truck was still there after a three day stay.

We didn’t realize the break-in until days after we got home since we were busy freaking out about the tiny E.T. lookalike that we were now responsible for keeping alive. When we did find out, my mind instantly started racing. I was sure that someone got our address off of the registration and would be by any day to steal the truck from our driveway. Since they were car thieves, they were most certainly baby thieves too and were going to steal Graham out of his crib at night.

That was it, any chance of ever sleeping again was over. I slept on the couch every night and lay there listening to each house sound, sure it was someone trying to break in. I would pace up and down the hallway outside of Graham’s room and look out the windows at suspicious shadows. I was emotionally drained from not sleeping, taking care of a newborn and still working full time from home. It took several months for the paranoia to subside. I reasoned that it wasn’t so bad since the break-in wasn’t at our actual house and nobody had ever come looking for the truck. I’m sure the pregnancy hormones still raging in my body didn’t help matters and I was glad when I was finally able to sleep.

In January of this year, it all came crashing down again. I was almost six months pregnant with Elliot and wasn’t sleeping all too well to begin with. I was extra restless one night and had gone to sleep on the couch to let Jamie get some sleep. Around 4AM, a loud knocking on the door jolted me awake. I froze. I couldn’t go to the bedroom to get Jamie because the front door has glass panes and I’d have to walk past whoever was knocking. I couldn’t find the phone or even MOVE because I was so panicked. I hid around the corner for a few minutes while whoever was out there continued to knock. They must have knocked for ten minutes. I finally reasoned that whoever was knocking would have broken in already if they were going to and peeked my head around the corner to see the policeman standing in the doorway. Someone had broken into the truck again. In our driveway. FIFTEEN FEET FROM MY SLEEPING SON’S HEAD. A neighbor had gotten up in the middle of the night for a drink and saw two guys trying to get into his car. The guys broke into several cars on our street and even opened a neighbor’s garage door. WHAT THE FUCK.

The police caught the guys on the other side of our block. They had stolen my Blue Tooth adapter, which we later got back. The police asked if I wanted to press charges. Absofuckinglutely I do, how dare they break into my vehicle on my property and steal my sense of security. I ended up not having to testify but one of them got community service and the other got a year in jail. That’s it.

So now I have not one, but two kids to worry about. I’m back to not sleeping. Every time I hear this Harvey Danger song, it reminds me of myself. It’s my own little theme song. The lyrics can be found here. Am I the only one out there who’s paranoid and losing sleep over their kids?

Tags: , , , ,


  1. Sprite's Keeper

    Girl, I am so freaking paranoid, when my husband locks up at night AND SETS THE HOUSE ALARM, I still get up 15 minutes later and check things myself to make sure locks are locked, alarm is on, and kid is in bed where she’s supposed to be. (Oh yeah, make sure the stove is off too, we may not have used it, but it needs to be checked.)
    You’ve got good style!

  2. mrsbear

    Dude, I never read this. If you would have posted this for Spin I would have thought you were stalking me SWF style. But I can TOTALLY relate, during our power outages for Hurricanes Katrina and Wilma in 2005, I refused to sleep with the windows open, even though it helped the hot stagnant air circulate through the house, I was terrified someone would break the screens and steal my babies, one or all of them. I would have been shitting bricks if anyone knocked on my door at 4 am. Great post. Thanks for the link, paranoia sis. 😉

    mrsbears last blog post..Paranoia Revisited – Spin Cycle

Leave a Reply

Fatal error: Call to undefined function live_preview() in /home2/halfucom/public_html/wp-content/themes/studiopressblack/comments.php on line 114