Why do people drive parallel to the car next to them and go ten miles under the speed limit?  Then when I’m driving along at a reasonable pace, someone rides my ass. I have my kids in the car, asshole. Plus, I’m going ten miles over the speed limit and I’m in the right lane minding my own business. Asswad.

I hate it when my food comes out cold at a restaurant but my kid’s food comes out burn-your-fucking-face off hot (and they set the steaming plate down in front of my two year old). It’s called common sense, people.

Why do drive thru people put the straw in the bag and then make you wait (with your drink) while they get the food together. Just give me the damn straw before I climb through this window and punch you in the throat.

On the rare opportunity when I get to go to the movies, some idiot always sits directly behind me in an empty theater. Then some other idiot sits directly in front of me so I can’t put my feet up. I should just stay home and order it on Netflix next time.

Please don’t let your obnoxious kid tackle mine and then pretend you didn’t see anything. I get it, kids tackle (well, some do) but get off of your ass and pry your child off of mine.

UPS never fails to show up at nap time. Obviously, the hours of 12:30 – 2:30 are the best time to drop by, every fucking time.

Have you ever accidentally caught the eye of the person in the car next to you at a light? Then you spend the entire duration of the red light trying with everything you have to avoid looking in that direction again. It never fails, I ALWAYS look again and get busted.

I hate Facebook. I know, that’s blasphemy. I’m so sick of people I never liked in the first place trying to link to me so they can up their numbers. Go the hell away, me no likey.

French fries. I couldn’t post my entire Random Tuesday Thoughts without them. They complete me. I didn’t actually eat any today, I used the Wii Fit instead. Go HASAY!

Poop. See above sentence.

For more randomness, head over to Keely’s place.

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39 Comments

  1. K
    on
    1

    I hate the hot food/toddler restaurant thing too.

    And I do love me a good french fries and poop story.

    Ks last blog post..My Happy Kid

  2. Ginny
    on
    2

    ooh, french fries complete me…I love it!

    I think I have the least amount of friends on Facebook that you can have, and not get kicked off. Is it possible to get kicked off of Facebook? Pretty sure it must be. I’m the unpopular Facebook kid. Just like high school all over again. And that’s OK with me!

    Ginnys last blog post..Random Tuesday Thoughts: Tossed Laundry and Steam

  3. Wendy
    on
    3

    Are there not weeks where you just want to hit everyone you see? Everyone is doing something to piss you off? Yeah. Me too. Better make sure we aren’t in the same place when that happens.

    Next time in the theater, just kick the dude in front of you in the head and say in your sweetest girlie voice, “oops, sorry” and smile,..with satisfaction.

    Wendys last blog post..New Word Thursday or please, someone yell Play Ball!

  4. Peggy
    on
    4

    You go girl! PMS or the dreaded french fry detox?? It’s all good! I’m with ya on all your observations, especially the “look the other way” parents…ugh!

    Peggys last blog post..Happy Birthday Littlest!

  5. Cat
    on
    5

    The stop light thing. I am SO guilty of that. I was laughing as I read it, because OH MY GOD that’s me exactly.

    You should be afraid that I can compare myself to you in any arena. Very afraid.

    Happy T Day.

    Cats last blog post..WARNING: BORING SCIENCE TALK AHEAD

  6. Michele
    on
    6

    Good girl staying away from the fries after the HASAY slap down the other day. Fries complete you. HeeHee, I’m still laughing.

    Micheles last blog post..So I’m all about the food

  7. Stacy (the Random Cool Chick)
    on
    7

    I can totally relate to everything you’ve written…well, except the UPS driver – for some reason, they think it’s cool to deliver the package at 7:00 pm when I’ve been waiting anxiously patiently all day long for said package. It’s only when I call to find out when it’s going to be delivered (considering it’s been ‘out for delivery’ since 6am), that they finally deliver around 7pm instead. Why does my box have to sit on their truck for 13 hours? 🙂

    Great job on the fries… 😉

    Stacy (the Random Cool Chick)s last blog post..Random Tuesday Thoughts

  8. Cameron
    on
    8

    Hey…good news. We both hate drive thru people today!!

    Camerons last blog post..Random Tuesday Thoughts (Monday Night…Whatever)

  9. WickedStepMom
    on
    9

    I hate social networking sites too. That is why I try to remain mostly anonymous on my blog.

    WickedStepMoms last blog post..The Wicked Step Mom Toolkit

  10. GreenJello
    on
    10

    I’m a FaceBook snob. I only friend my actual friends, not my acquaintances. Which means my high school peeps (with rare exceptions) are completely ignored.

    GreenJellos last blog post..Random Tuesday Thoughts

  11. Keely
    on
    11

    You shouldn’t be going through drivethroughs at all anymore!! 😉

    A friend of mine was holding his ten month old son and the barista set his coffee down right in front of him. Yeah, 3rd degree burns all over that baby’s crotch.

    Keelys last blog post..Biohazard: Random Tuesday Thoughts

  12. Julie@Cool Mom Guide
    on
    12

    First off, you’re a mind reader. Secondly, did I frighten you with my whole ‘move in with me’ thing? I actually did mean it you know. It’s only for 2 weeks and finally, I think it’s hot to see my hubbys button in the EC slot. I’m totally dropping on my husband on your site. Scandalous!

    Julie@Cool Mom Guides last blog post..It’s Tuesday, I’m Thinking and it’s Random (with pictures)

  13. Sprite's Keeper
    on
    13

    Ugh on #2! I even tell the servers to put Sprite’s meal in front of me! And they STILL put the hot plate in front of her so she can start grabbing and throwing a fit when I take it away to portion it out and cut the food. Bastards. I think they get a kick out of it. Too bad the tip does too…

    Sprite’s Keepers last blog post..It’s Tuesday, It’s Random, You Should Expect It Now

  14. Sammanthia
    on
    14

    I’m loving Mr. Linky, I want to come up with something just so I can have one of my very own, but I don’t think Typepad has an option for Mr. Linky, otherwise Sprite’s Keeper would be using it.
    I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to use your comment for my random thoughts.
    ANYWAY.
    I hate getting busted staring at people. That’s why I wear sunglasses, even in the winter.

    Sammanthias last blog post..Random Thoughts: Leave The Gun, Take The Cannoli

  15. Lydia @ On The Verge
    on
    15

    I can’t agree more with all of these. Especially the UPS guy! Seriously, it took me all morning to get the down and you are gonna ring my doorbell now???

    Lydia @ On The Verges last blog post..Would You Like Some Cheese With My Whine?

  16. Keli
    on
    16

    You just ably summarized what I blog about – stupers (short for tirelessly stupid persons).
    I hate it when people pace me when I drive, lock lips on my bumper, fail to use their turn signals, bring my food out cold, talk out loud to themselves in the movie theater like there’s no one else around….you get the picture!

    Kelis last blog post..Stupidity, Bulk Bins and Dirty Hands

  17. HeatherPride
    on
    17

    Wow, you are on a roll today!! But you never fail to crack me up! I wish I had some french fries. Instead I’m stuck at my desk eating the packet of oatmeal I fished out of my purse for lunch. Tasty?

    HeatherPrides last blog post..The Secret Life of HeatherPride

  18. mrsbear
    on
    18

    Nice work walking away from the fries, or actually not getting in the car to drive over there and purchase 500 calories in a cardboard pouch. Go HASAY.

    I’m not entirely sure how to feel about Facebook. I just joined up and I feel like I’m not “getting” it, everyone’s got like 5,000 friends…how do you even keep up with what 5,000 people are doing? Why would I even care? Wouldn’t my friends just call me direct if they wanted to know what the heck I was up to? Or read the blog at least…scratch that, I’m still incognito.

    mrsbears last blog post..Bla Bla and the Blahs – Random Tuesday Thoughts

  19. Ryan
    on
    19

    That was tremendous. I think I suck at driving and have a lot of people that will back me up here. So it is a huge deal when I drive past someone and flip them off for driving like crap. If only they knew how low on the crappy-driver-ometer they were… I’ve often wanted to install one of those LCD signs in my rear window that I could update with messages for the person I just swerved in front of without signaling.

    Ryans last blog post..Manspecting Part 2 – You’ll Never Know Until You Trimester

  20. Kristy
    on
    20

    You are so funny Casey..Your posts always make me laugh…I agree with the UPS man…he loves to show up at Nap time…and the dogs always go ape shit..Never fails! I’m still with HASAY…but I just recently got over a breast infection, so I’ve been out of commission and not working out…I’ll get back on the bandwagon soon, I promise!

    Kristys last blog post..Top 5 Tips for Raising a Healthy Child (Contest)

  21. Sarah
    on
    21

    Oh I soo look back everytime. Usually when its like some hot guy who probably knows it and thinks I want him since I looked at him twice…: )

    Sarahs last blog post..Random Word Generator

  22. bex
    on
    22

    Casey, are you ok, hon? (don’t you hate when people call you hon?) i sense some hostility in this post. maybe you need some more french fries.

    bexs last blog post..Random Tuesday pictures

  23. Monica
    on
    23

    Too funny. Next time you are trying to avoid the eye contact you should turn up the radio and start rocking out. Then they will be the ones trying to avoid eye contact! -M

    Monicas last blog post..Cacacopa

  24. Lisa
    on
    24

    I hate Facebook too and I hate when people who never spoke to me in high school now want me to “friend” them. yeah, you have 400 friends. Aren’t you dang cool!? Losers. Haven’t experienced the too-hot food for my toddler yet, but I bet I will and some waitress will get decked.

    Lisas last blog post..Nuthin’ like readin’ the minutes from a "senior club" meeting. Whooo-hoo!

  25. Amber
    on
    25

    I’m with you on the facebook thing. I like to stay in contact with my REAL friends on there but if I never talked to you in high school…run along.
    And may I just say that when I was a waitress I never put the hot plates in front of kids. Duh.
    And your randomness is by far my favorite random post to read!

    Ambers last blog post..Happy Birthday, Hayden!

  26. Michelle
    on
    26

    I found myself nodding at pretty much everything you said. People can be irritating sometimes… a lot of the time… ugh.

    Michelles last blog post..Random Tuesday Thoughts: On Time!

  27. Cape Cod Gal
    on
    27

    French fries and poop! My Tuesday is complete!

    Cape Cod Gals last blog post..Random Mindless Stuff

  28. ChurchPunkMom
    on
    28

    I refuse to effbook, or myspace.. they suck poopy french fries.

    aaannd.. now my WonderBaby is climbing on top of the dining room table.. toodles!

    ChurchPunkMoms last blog post..Awards, Short Stories, and Ditching Kittens..

  29. Captain Dumbass
    on
    29

    I’m with you on Facebook, if I haven’t talked to you in 20 years, good chance there’s a reason for it. And adding people just so you can have more friends? Could you be more of a loser? I hate it when people do that on Twitter too.

    I want some fries.

    Captain Dumbasss last blog post..Random Tuesday: You Want Random? YOU CAN’T HANDLE RANDOM!

  30. Toni
    on
    30

    I so agree with you on all of this. Well except the movies, not that I don’t agree with you but I can’t remember the last time I went to the movies.

    Also, my kid can sleep through people stopping by unless it is close to time for him to wake up anyway. That sucks.

    Tonis last blog post..Reading…

  31. FoN
    on
    31

    Oh god, that restaurant food thing pisses me off SO much. They also put a huge, full glass of water (with ice) RIGHT in front of the toddler.

    Everybody on the road are assholes. Accept for me. I drive the correct speed – everyone else is wrong.

    FoNs last blog post..Random Tuesday – Beware, I’m dull as….can’t even think of a good analogy for dull

  32. shonda
    on
    32

    Damn that is random, but is was awesomely funny.
    I really hate when the people sit next at the theater. You are suppose to be comfortable when you watch a movie, but you can’t when you have some stranger up in your bid-niz.

    shondas last blog post..Hellbent on Lent

  33. Angel
    on
    33

    I am a facebook snob too. If I don’t know you I don’t add you. Drive thru people are annoying too, they always get your order wrong and then get mad when you ask for things they forgot. like my sisters food.

  34. DeeMarie
    on
    34

    I love this post!! I agree with everything. Yet, how are we not FB friends??????

    DeeMaries last blog post..I’m So In!!

  35. jenni
    on
    35

    seriously drive through people, get it together!

    jennis last blog post..Thing 1 & Thing 2

  36. Katie
    on
    36

    I made accidental eye contact at a red light today with a lady who did about 25mph over the speedlimit just to beat me to the (red)light. I couldn’t help but look over to see who the jackass was. She caught me.

    Katies last blog post..Wordless Wednesday…almost

  37. carrie
    on
    37

    the straw in the bag always pisses me off. WTF??? Giving me a drink with no straw until you pack my food. Bastards..

    carries last blog post..Mike & The Massage….

  38. carrie
    on
    38

    Um…. I think I posted my commnet for this one somewhere else…..I have no clue where it is……
    crap.

    carries last blog post..Mike & The Massage….

  39. BassAckwards Mom
    on
    39

    I’m also a FB snob… adding only people I’d actually talk too… and the toddler hot food bit – I have learned the daunting lesson of ordering the toddlers food when we order our drinks and this is what I say “I want you to put the kids order in NOW and let it sit on the bar back there and cool off until ours is ready LATER.” I’m pretty anal about that one.

    Great post!

    BassAckwards Moms last blog post..Random Tuesday Thoughts – Spring, Allergies, Oranges and stuff

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