For those of you who celebrate Christmas (or Hanukkah or Kwanza), do you remember getting those unexpected late gifts and getting so excited for just ONE MORE PRESENT? You know what I’m talking about, the package that arrives from Aunt Shirley a week after Xmas or the gift your mom forgot to wrap since it was hidden so deep in her closet to avoid you finding it when you snooped. Yes, I was the ultimate snooper and my parents had to be clever when they hid my Xmas presents. Well, this week’s Spin Cycle was to do a Secret Santa post about one of your favorite blogs, and I’m pulling mine out of the closet a day late. Surprise!
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My Secret Santa recipient is someone who I’ve grown very close to over the past few months. Being that I’ve never actually spoken to her in real life, that sounds sort of creepy but it’s true. Mrs Bear (who will be known as The Bear for the remainder of this post) from Outnumbered Two To One has quickly become my Bloggy BFF. This week’s spin forced me to delve through The Bear’s archives and catch up on her old posts and it was like finding lost episodes of my favorite TV show. I was a little worried that The Bear would see me poking around in her archives and finally get that restraining order notarized but hopefully she was too distracted with the holidays to notice.

The Bear and I have a strange way of communicating. Every night around 11PM, we start our nightly ritual of exchanging email threads. We have several hanging around from comment reply emails that turned into conversations that just can’t die. So we keep a thread open for each topic of conversation and we’ve had up to ten threads going at any one time. It’s a running joke between us and it’s something to look forward to at the end of a stressful day. It’s also sort of like a staring contest, the first one to kill a thread might as well have blinked and lost the game.

Now that I’ve described our very strange relationship, let me tell you WHY I like The Bear so much. She’s just my kind of people. She’s sarcastic, not afraid to make fun of herself (or her kids) and is just an all around great person. Even though she has double the amount of kids that I do, we have so much in common on the parenting front. She held my virtual hand throughout all of Graham’s ear infections and let me bitch and moan way too much. Here are just a few of The Bear’s posts that I could have written myself:

She paranoid like I am.

She would just about murder for nap time.

She shares my same brand of social awkwardness.

BOGO makes her giddy. BOGOBOGOBOGOBOGO. Every time I hear that word, it gets stuck in my head and I go around saying BOGOBOGOBOGO a million times until Jamie yells at me to stop. BOGO. I just can’t.

She has been covered in more baby shit and puke than I have. Thankfully, this has never happened to me. Yet.

Her Tasmanian Toddler has an energy level that rivals Graham’s. That’s not an easy task. We think they’re secretly communicating and sharing tips on how to drive their parents insane. That reminds me, I need to change all of my passwords to something the kid can’t figure out. He’s onto me.

Those were just a few of The Bear’s greatest hits. I could seriously list ALL of her shit on here and tell you that it’s why I like her but you should really go check her out for yourself. If you’re reading my blog because you like my sense of humor, then you’ll like hers even more. Plus, she knows big words and actually uses them in the right context.

Lastly (I feel like I’m writing a term paper here), The Bear and I have recently communicated using SNAIL MAIL! That’s right, I actually know The Bear’s true identity and address and have SEEN HER PHYSICAL HANDWRITING (which was nice, btw!). I’m not telling you what her real name is or where she lives since I claim her all to myself to stalk as I please but I urge you to click on over and check her out. You might just get an email thread out of it. What are you still doing here? Go!

Bear, are you still reading this? If so, I present you with this Not-So-Secret Santa (slightly stalkerish) gift and hope that you like it:

Tags: Spin Cycle

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