December 22, 2008 12:01 am
What a weekend. Graham is doing about the same, still refusing to drink ANYTHING so we’re still having to force liquids into him. Saturday night was spent at the after hours pediatrics place getting IV fluids pumped into him since he had gotten dehydrated. Not a fun way to spend his birthday (yes, his actual birthday was on Saturday). Today, he managed to eat a few bites of mac-n-cheese and some applesauce so it’s something. Enough of the depressing stuff, onto funnier things.
Today’s guest poster is Katie from Stray Raisins and Other Mommy Perks. If you haven’t stopped by Katie’s site yet, she’s worth the read. Katie is another potty-mouthed version of me but she’s girly, whereas I’m a big fat tomboy. She’s witty and sarcastic and everything I love in a fellow blogger. Katie has also been unofficially supporting (and once in awhile mocking) our HASAY progress since the club’s inception and today’s post is no different. Thanks for being there for us Katie!
When Casey asked me to guest post after she found out about Graham’s surgical hat trick, I had a minor heart attack. Not only is this my first guest post, but it’s on a blog that people actually read. Half as Good as You, home of HASAY and the hardest working blogger south of the Mason Dixon. That sounds absurd coming from someone who grew up in New Jersey.
But, if I’m not invited to the hospital, than holding down the blog-fort is the next best thing. It’s worth the globby ball of plaque floating through my arteries right now, looking for a nice vital place to stick, because I sympathize with little Grahamburger. While I’ve never had tubes put in my ears, my adenoids out, or a tonsillectomy, I have had two C-Sections and one helluva stinging episiotomy – not that it’s a competition or anything (but if it was I’d totally win. It doesn’t take 21 hours to push a tonsil out). Clearly the plaque just found it’s new home in my brain.
And speaking of competitions, I have something to confess. I never joined HASAY. Believe me people, it’s for your own good. How can I be trusted to be a companion in the weight loss crusade when this was my week:
a. Attend lovely cookie exchange party on Wednesday evening. Remark about how beautiful all the cookies look and compliment each partygoer on how awesome her cookies are.
b. Drink a bit too much punch and end up taking home a giant tinful of cookies from the party
c. Wake up feeling slightly queasy from the night before and understandably, the only cure must be to eat some cookies with my morning coffee
d. Have cookies for lunch
e. Have cookies for dinner
f. Eat the very last of the cookies for breakfast and breathe a sigh of relief because now I can start fresh on losing that last 10 pounds without the cookies calling me back to the kitchen.
g. Go get the mail, and find that I’ve received TWO boxes of cookies as gifts. Shit.
This pretty much sums up the last 10 years for me. It’s also the reason why I religiously haul my carcass down to the basement and crank out a few miles on the treadmill each morning while little Ella takes her nap. I hate it. Stupid ice cream cheesecake cookies.
See? You don’t want me as your support system. You’ll call me up to see if I want to go for a jog, and my voice will be all muffled, and you’ll say, “Are you eating cookies?”, and I’ll say “Noh, ah sweah to Gah, es carruts”.
On the other hand, I make a damn fine bathing suit shopping companion. I will always tell you how small that string bikini makes your ass look, and how the flourescent lights really flatter your skin tone, NO MATTER WHAT. There’s enough pain in the world, who needs honest friends?
Graham, I hope you feel better soon, little buddy. Casey, I hope you get a good nights sleep in 2009, and in the words of the other cookie addict, “Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!”